Operation slowly depressing and shocking myself to death - On.

Picture courtesy of Guy guide.

This guy is a week older than me. A week. And look at his body. My God! Can somebody please look at those abs and tell me that he has at least 30 gallons of steroids in his blood stream? Pretty please? Or tell me that he's so extremely stupid, he doesn't even know if chicken or egg came first.

On the other hand, I went to the GLBT center today. Luckily they were closed because as I stood there reading all those flyers, I can't help but frown. I wasn't prepared. I judged. Tomorrow. Tomorrow, I will walk into that center and I will be prepared.

Oh the other other hand, I don't even know how to write about this. You think you know someone, and then she go ahead and tell you that she has a 2 year old daughter. Just when you think you know someone, you don't. I've known her for 4 years. 4 years. 2 year old daughter. The math works out, but everything else doesn't. I still think I'm dreaming.

Speaking of dreams, this morning I had a dream that woke me up. In the dream, I was riding my bicycle, on what seems to be a straight, leveled road. But all of a sudden, a hill is coming right up. I got to the top, and came down. And down, and down and down. The slope never ends. I tried to brake but the brake was broken.

Then I smashed into a wall. A beige colored wall.

4 posts on the 4th of July. Happy Inde-fucking-pendence Day to me.