Friday, July 15, 2005

I am seeing circles... They are moving... Or are they?

Guess where I'm at right now.

You'll never figure out. So why don't you just give up.

Fine. I can wait. I have all the time in the world. You, on the other hand, don't. Because my nipples are harder than yours. Yes, mine are really really tough. I cut glass with it. But of course I gotta twist it a little bit first before the real cutting began.

Forgive me if I sound delirious. That's because I have never been so tired in my entire life. Maybe I have, like that time I jerked off 20 times back to back. At the end, all that came out during orgasm was just bubbles. Not the kind that pops, but the kind that stick to the penis head.

I just realized that I like to write about penises a lot. And titties too. I love penises and titties. I hate pussies because they smell like fish.

Anyway, I'm at the front desk of the local GLBT center right now as I'm typing this on a 20 year old computer that still works surprisingly well. Remember that one night when I talked about volunteering here? Well, I did. And I'm so very proud of myself. Because this is probably the first thing that I said I'm gonna do, and actually do it. You may praise me now in my comment box. Go ahead, don't be shy. I'll wait for you. Be as generous as you want. Don't forget to include things like "You're so fucking hot I want to do you right now" or "God, your dick is HUGE" or "Will you let me blow you?"

All done? Did you wash your hand and zip up your pants?


However, I am totally blank right now. The other guy that works here, Frank, just showed me everything I need to know, and I absorbed nothing. Why am I so tired? Let me give you a tour of my schedule today.

12.05 am - Went to sleep with the lights on because I have to wake up and study in a couple of hours.
2.45 am - Woke up with a start for no reason. I always get like this whenever I sleep with the lights on.
3.00 am - Alarm went off for the 1st time.
3.05 am - Got up. Went to the computer. Checked email. Checked my comments. Ended up chatting with Martin for a little bit.
4.00 am - He ended up knocking some sense into me. I mean, it's fucking summer, for Christ sake! What if I don't graduate with honors? Will I die? Will my balls disappear? NO! So I went back to sleep. Martin, you rock.
5.30 am - Alarm went off for the 2nd time.
6.15 am - Alarm went off for the 3rd time. Woke up and realized that I have exactly 2 hours 15 minutes before midterm and I have about 2 weeks worth of reading to do. Panic mode: ON.
7.40 am - Drop the kids off at the pool while trying to figure out what the hell is glycolysis.
8.30 am - Got to class. Sat down, and mentally prepared myself not to scream when I got the midterm.
8.50 am - Still trying to look for a problem I know how to do.
10.30 am - Turn in a mostly blank test.
11.00 am - Got to lab. Start doing research.
1.00 pm - Hungry. But no time to eat.
2.00 pm - Famished.
3.00 pm - Boss blaming me for something I didn't do. The culprit is the computer. Not me. But I'm too hungry to talk.
3.05 pm - Got to the optometry clinic. I'm gonna be a guinea pig for the next 3 weeks, wearing different contact lenses every week. What's the purpose of the study? Who cares? I'm all for the money.
3.40 pm - Went home. Call 45,667 people about the room for rent.
4.10 pm - A guy is supposed to come look at the place at 4. He's late.
4.20 pm - He showed up with an entourage. Ridi-fucking-culous.
4.40 pm - Went to the pool.
5.45 pm - Dead tired from the workout.
6.10 pm - Got home and showered.
6.25 pm - Eat dinner.
7.02 pm - Got to the GLBT center a little late for the first day of work. Great.
9.31 pm - Sitting here typing this.
10.00 pm - Will go home, smoke a bowl, and pass out.

And I didn't even have time to jerk off today.