Introducing Grilled Threesome Burrito King, also known as Mambo No.6.

I just spent $80 on groceries.

I don't know why I need to tell you that.

It's the most I've spent on groceries just for myself. I'm eating too much. I'm turning into... what's the opposite of aneroxic?

I don't know why you need to know that as well.

I started summer school today. The word summer shouldn't be in there. Because this class is at 8.30 in the morning, 5 days a week. Where's the summer? This morning my sleepy ass somehow managed to hauled itself to class only 5 minutes late, and zone off right the second I sat down. I'm so going to get my round, delicious, cute bubble butt kicked in this class.

I still don't know why I'm telling you this. It's not like you care. Much.

By the way, can people get any weirder?

The answer is always YES.

I posted my previous post about me dying very soon because there's a giant earthquake coming on Craigslist's Missed Connections because, you know, me and threesome are missing each other everyday.

I got a response that I have to share with the two of you who are reading this.

Hello kind friend.

I feel your anguish and confusion* as the times haven't been so clear** to us in this recent period***. I understand your strive for maximizing happiness and pleasure and I applaud your endeavors. The best of luck to you! I would love to hear how everything works out for you-my guess is it will, wonderfully.

Tomorrow I am unable to participate in the threesome but I would love to share with you my newest source of excitement. It began with two friends, one who wanted to grill, one who wanted to get burritos. I found myself caught in the middle, unsure who to side with. Then the brightest idea of my life came to mind...****



That's right--I bbq'd a burrito!

yours truly,
The Grilled Threesome Burrito King, aka Mambo No.6*****

Did you know that when people put up a post about threesome on Craigslist, they are secretly hoping to hear about grilled burrito? Because you know, grilled burrito and threesome go hand in hand. I don't know about you, but I usually grill a burrito right before I have a threesome.


* Who say anything about me being anguish and confused? I didn't.
** I know. It's been pretty cloudy this couple days.
*** What recent period? The last time I had a period was in my past life, where I was a bar maid in La Fiesta de Taco Tavern in the middle east. We specialized in taco-flavored kisses.
**** Since when does threesome = grill + burritos + excitement?
***** Of course he didn't call himself that. I call him that.