Monday, July 18, 2005

Watch out, he's dirty.

There's something I think I should clarify.

1. I've never jerked off 20 times in a row. I don't know anybody who has jerked off 20 times in a row. That is insane. I can only do it 1 time, and I gotta take a break before going again. My personal record was 10 times in 2.5 hours. It was when I was studying for the most boring class in the world. Yes, I get horny whenever I study. I get horny sitting in boring lectures too. This morning we had a guest lecturer, and my blood left my brain for my junk 4 times in an hour. Yeah, that's how boring it was.

2. I've never shot bubbles. Or blow bubbles. Or ejaculate bubbles. But I do know somebody who has. In high school, there's this weird boy, let's call him Cygnet. He tells people the weirdest things. One time, Cygnet told everybody that he jerked off 5 times in a row, and he ejaculated bubbles the 5th times. Speaking of weird boys, there's another weird boy, let's call him Weirdo. Weirdo claims that he can ejaculate without touching his dick. He said the way he do it, he just sits on the toilet, and concentrate really really hard on his dick, and eventually he'll cum. This is actually feasible if you can focus that hard. Not that I've done it myself, but people say that's how you get wet dreams. Go try it, and let me know if you succeed.

I'm bored, grumpy, tired, horny, hungry and anxious right now.

Work sucks. School sucks.

Oh and I saw Mark at the pool last Saturday. But we didn't have sex.

Oh and does anybody watch
Def Poetry on HBO? It's mindblowing. The talents are phenomenal. Sometimes famous people like Alicia Keys, Lauren Hill and Dave Chapelle would "guest star", but they're always never as good as the non famous people. I watched a ton of them over the weekend while I was getting high. Man, some of them make me want to cry.

Oh and I went to a lake with my roommate yesterday. It was fun. But I have a little confession to make:

I have not showered since I got home from the lake yesterday.

And I peed and swam in the lake.